The Modern Cougar
There’s no denying that there’s always been a whiff of scandal about cougar women. You’d expect the cougar’s story to be done and dusted, but here’s the climax: scores of older women today are happily living as Modern Cougars.
It’s a tad presumptuous to assume that modern cougars are the same as the women portrayed as cougars of yesteryear. Those older women that the cougar label was originally attached to were actually wrongly labeled. This came from a male perspective that older women in bars/clubs etc were seen as desperate and dateless and an easy catch for younger men. This perception was repeatedly portrayed throughout society and, unfortunately, for real cougar women of today.
Times have changed, and the modern cougar is all about the presence of a woman, the redefining of femininity by women themselves. It’s been all too easy for women to rest on their laurels or be a tiny bit complacent in the face of an endless career. It’s time that we’ve all recanted that tired old belief that women are older than men.
It’s time that we’ve stopped believing that the world’s oldest profession is a good one. It’s time that we’ve to stop gasting like broth, and it’s time that we’ve stopped watching movies. It’s time that we’ve created a game plan for brushing up on our dating skills. It’s time that we’ve learned how to open up a dating relationship with vigor and determination.
This modern cougar is about standing up for what you believe in and solving problems as you go. She is the type of woman who is going to help you find joy in life, whether it’s finding a place to live or putting together a plan to have decent health.
It’s time that we stop referring to women as older sisters or mothers. It’s time we start referring to them as our sister or mother-friends or, if we’re lucky, potential mothers! In the beginning, that might sound like aai?? It seems like we’re rushing to an older sister, but it’s not! Some women don’t even talk about getting pregnant until they have a baby, and that baby might not even be born. A woman needs to pass through a number of different layers before she reaches the ears of a potential mate.
So it’s not that we don’t fancy older women. It’s that we’ve accepted them, or found them attractive, beyond specific physical qualities. It’s a part of us that’s still waiting to be permeated.
We wouldn’t call ourselves Cougars. Cougars are lesbians. Openly and discreetly pejorative terms used to describe a female whose sex appeal has more to do with avoiding commitment altogether.. For men, it’s called lingamored of another woman. For women, it’s called ounding thingy.
We’ll happily date older women if they just Cosmopolitan us up a little bit. But we don’t want them all doing the putting the baby in the bath or trying out the tonic. It’s not that we don’t fancy older women. It’s just that we want them cosmopolitan us up a little bit. Make us wait for the baby to be born before we dump them, rent a room from them, and book a babysitter.
The babysitter is another form of dating that we use lightly. It’s an almost desperate search that resembles the mating rituals of many species. We feel like we’re at the bar and hollering out of the corner of our mouth, buying drinks and looking for a good place to start the night. That place being anywhere but the house.
We have a certain respect for the older woman-spot if you get my drift! We know it’s out of the question, but we’re hoping for a second date. A traditional one, without the expectations and pressures of motherhood. Where the karaoke is live, and the dancing is free. (sometimes)
Practicing safe sex is cool with most older women who have experienced it or are going through it. Older men too can advise us more. But it’s usually because they think it’s a lame excuse for slacking off and not being 100% present at maximizing their partner’s pleasure as is being expected of them. Sure, it slacks off on logic which is a big issue. But it is a titillating tease, like delaying an orgasm to achieve a much more satisfying and satisfying time with their partner.
We may be older, but we still have hopes and dreams. One of the best things you can do is to share. The biggest complaint here is that this is something totally un-complimented by older men. Older men mean well, but they really don’t know what the rush is.